Nothing left to Argue, Nothing Left to Say

here's to afterhighschool romances being exactly like the ones that we experienced when we were there. Here's to my stupidass believing that love could really save me, and really bring me back to earth. And finally, here's to heartbreak, but never breaking up. It's a toast to being lonely, but somehow still not being alone. And it's a toast to crying and drowning yourself in the tub. I don't know where I'm going, or if my words are taking me there, but all I can say for fucking sure is that I wish to god he'd be walking up those stairs. I'm tired and I'm uneasy, and I feel like I've already lost the race, when the honest truth is that I probably never ever kept up with a single pace. I'm a gimmick, I'm a joke, I'm everything he thought he wanted, but nothing that he chose. I'm his dream girl to a tee, but how the hell does he know what he wants anyway. I'm fucked up, I'm hurting and where is he? I don't have a damn clue. He's as lost to me as I am right now. And the sad part of everything? He's the only one that I have to call. I have not a fucking soul in the world to go to right now other than the person that I all of the sudden feel the need to run away from. That's not even the truth, he was the one that ran away from me.

so run run run away, everything will eventually be okay... but just remember that those you leave behind, they change, they rearrange, and sometimes lose their mind.

i give up i'm not making sense or helping myself in the least with this stupid shit,

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